Are you bored, or need to have some fun? If so, this post is for you! In this post, I will share with you the 35 things that amused me the most and made me giggle. They include jokes, pictures, videos, and poems.
Have a good laugh!
Jokes
(Mouse over ‘Answer’ to see each answer)
1.
Knock knock.
Who’s there?
Mary Lee.
Mary Lee who?
Mary Lee, Mary Lee, Mary Lee, Mary Lee. Life is but a dream!
2.
How do superstars stay cool?
Answer
3.
Have you ever wondered why our nose runs and our feet smell?
4.
Guy: Is this my train?
Worker: No, it belongs to the railway company.
Guy: Can I take this train to India?
Worker: No, I’m afraid it is too heavy.
5.
Why do you believe it when someone tells you there are four billion stars, but you always check when you see the wet paint sign?
6.
Why do birds fly south?
Answer
7.
Why do we press harder at a remote when the batteries are dead?
8.
How does a moose start a letter to his cousin?
Answer
9.
Patient: Doctor! Doctor! Everyone keeps on copying me!
Doctor: Doctor! Doctor! Everyone keeps on copying me!
10.
Patient: Doctor! Doctor! I am beginning to behave like a chicken.
Doctor: Why didn’t you tell me that earlier? We needed eggs.
11.
How do you put an elephant in the fridge?
Answer
How do you put a giraffe in the fridge?
Answer
The lion king is celebrating a party and everyone in the forest must be present. Who didn’t make it to the party?
Answer
You want to cross a river in a jungle, but it was inhabited by dangerous crocodiles. How should you cross it?
Answer
12.
Why didn’t the woman run when the lion was charging at her?
Answer
Images
(Click image to go to original source)
17.
“Naptime”
19.
"Dang! I’m NEVER going to get the hang of this game!"
21.
"Don’t just take a picture – get him OFF!"
23.
”Please, bird, come down here.”
Video Clips
25.
Cat Versus Printer – Who will win?
26.
Darth Vader being a smart. So funny 😀 .
Poems
(Click on author name for original source)
27.
I Will Not Tease Rebecca Grimes
I have to write one hundred times:
"I will not tease Rebecca Grimes."
Okay, that’s one. I’m far from done.
(This isn’t gonna be much fun.)
“I will not tease Rebecca Grimes."
That’s two. I’m paying for my crimes.
It’s all because I pulled her hair
And put spaghetti on her chair.
Because I gave her goofy looks
And squirted mustard on her books,
I have to write one hundred times:
"I will not tease Rebecca Grimes."
That’s three. Whoopee. It’s going slow.
Just ninety-seven more to go.
"I will not tease" (I’m keeping score.)
"Rebecca Grimes." (Now that makes four.)
I’m soaked with sweat. My shirt is damp.
I think I’m getting writer’s cramp.
"I will not, will not, will not tease
Rebecca Grimes!" Can I stop, please?
The teacher frowns, and that means no.
I still have sixty-six to go.
"I will-will-will not-not-not-not
Tease-tease-tease-tease…" It’s getting hot.
"I will not tease Rebecca Grimes."
That’s ninety-nine. The school bell chimes.
Just one more line and I’ll be through.
Rebecca Grimes, this one’s for you!
My final line will rhyme with "Grimes":
"I will not tease Rebecca…Slimes!"
Rebecca Slimes! Ha ha! That’s great!
I’d better hide it. Oops! Too late!
The teacher sees what I wrote down.
She takes my paper with a frown.
I now must write one thousand times:
"I will not tease Rebecca Grimes."
-by Dave Crawley
28.
Happy Birthday to Me
Happy birthday to me.
I like what I see!
There’s plenty of junk food,
and the presents are free!
-by Bruce Lansky
29.
Jack Was Nimble
Jack was nimble,
Jack was quick.
Jack jumped over the candlestick.
Jack kept jumping,
much too close.
Now his pants
smell like burnt toast.
-by Bruce Lansky
30.
Peter, Peter, Sugar Eater
Peter, Peter, sugar eater,
always wanted food much sweeter.
Adding sugar was a blunder.
Now he is a toothless wonder.
-by Bruce Lansky
31.
Swimming Ool
Swimming in the swimming pool
is where I like to "B,"
wearing underwater goggles
so that I can "C."
Yesterday, before I swam,
I drank a cup of "T."
Now the pool is just an “ool”
because I took a "P."
-by Kenn Nesbitt
32.
Insomnia
I cannot get to sleep tonight.
I toss and turn and flop.
I try to count some fluffy sheep
while o’er a fence they hop.
I try to think of pleasant dreams
of places really cool.
I don’t know why I cannot sleep—
I slept just fine at school.
33.
Don’t Suck Your Thumb
“Don’t suck your thumb,”
my mother said.
I answered, “Why?”
and scratched my head.
She said, “It’s dumb!
Now go to bed.”
That night I sucked my toe instead.
-by Bruce Lansky
34.
Scrambled
I climbed up the door and
I opened the stairs.
I said my pajamas
and buttoned my prayers.
I turned off the covers
and pulled up the light.
I’m all scrambled up since
she kissed me last night.
-by Bruce Lansky
35.
My Snowman
My snowman had a lemon nose
And lemons for his ears.
His eyes were made of lemon slices,
Hair of lemon spears.
His teeth were candy lemon drops
That smiled in the shade,
But then the sun came out and turned him
Into lemonade.
-by Neal Levin